Asking someone to write you a letter of recommendation can feel like pulling teeth! It's awkward, it's nerve-wracking, and most of us would rather do almost anything else.
But here's the reality - according to recent education stats, about 87% of universities consider recommendation letters "important" or "very important" in their decision-making.
So you've got to bite the bullet! Whether you're trying to get into your dream uni, land that perfect job, or snag a spot in graduate school, knowing how to ask for a letter of recommendation might just be the difference between success and disappointment.
Let's sort this out together, shall we?
Why Are Letters of Recommendation Important?
Think of letters of recommendation as your covert weapon. They tell universities and companies something about you that your grades and resume cannot.
Even if your application says what you've accomplished, these letters show who you are. They show your character, your work ethic and your potential from someone else's point of view.
A good letter of recommendation can set you apart when the competition is fierce (and let's face it, when isn't it these days?). It's like having someone in your corner saying, "Hey, this person is great; trust me!"
Sometimes, that vote of confidence can change everything.
How to Ask for a Letter of Recommendation
Okay, let's get right to it. There's a right way and a wrong way to approach this whole procedure. Here's the right way without making you or your recommender want to crawl under a rock.
1. Decide carefully who you are going to ask
Don't just choose the professor with the flashiest title or the boss who seems the most approachable. You need someone who can talk about your skills and really understands your work. A vague letter from someone who has impressed you is nowhere near as useful as a thorough letter from someone who has actually seen you.
Choose managers or teachers who have seen you overcome obstacles, solve problems or exceed expectations. Not just general praise but specific anecdotes about your brilliance should qualify the person to write your recommendation.
2. Make sure you have a good connection
Think about your relationship with the person before you ask for a letter. Have you actively participated in their course? Made an important contribution at work? Have you been hiding in the back row to avoid being seen? Your recommender should know more than just your name.
They should know your aspirations, how you work and your particular skills. If you ask this person for a letter of recommendation, make sure they have seen enough of your work to make an honest assessment of your abilities.
3. Try to ask in person
I know, I know - sending an email is so much easier. But whenever possible, request in person first. Pop by during office hours or schedule a quick coffee. Face-to-face requests are harder to ignore, and they show you respect the person enough to have a proper conversation about it.
Can't meet in person? A video call works, too. Just avoid making your first request via text or email if you can help it. Personal connections matter when you're asking for a letter of recommendation via email follow-up!
4. Send an email with all the necessary information
After your conversation, send an email with all the necessary information. This should contain everything: Your resume, personal statement, job description and application guidelines. Don't leave them scrambling for information; remember, they are providing you with great service.
Your email should clearly state what the recommendation is for, what accomplishments you want to highlight, and when and how the letter should be sent. If you're really organised, you'll show them you value their time and that you want a letter of recommendation that wasn't written on a whim.
5. Give them enough time to write the letter
Don't put it off until the last minute! Your recommenders have their own lives and work commitments. Try to give them at least 3–4 weeks before the deadline.
Keep in mind that your instructors may be writing dozens of these letters at a time if you are applying to university. If you give them plenty of notice, they can write something thoughtful and won't have to rush to meet your deadline. No one writes a good letter of recommendation under pressure or out of resentment over being rushed.
6. Send a follow-up email just before the deadline
Gentle urging is perfectly acceptable if you have not yet received a response and the deadline is approaching. Stay friendly and say, "I just wanted to inquire about the letter of recommendation; the deadline is next Friday" If you need anything else from me, just let me know! Most recommenders appreciate this reminder in busy times.
Always, always, always send a thank you note after they've sent the letter. This small gesture will keep the doors open for you should you need their help again in your academic journey or job search, and it will mean a lot to you.
How to Ask for a Letter of Recommendation Template
Template for asking a professor:
Subject: Request for a Letter of Recommendation - [Your Name]
Dear Professor [Name],
I hope this finds you well! Your [specific course] last semester was great, and I especially appreciated your insights into [specific topic].
I would be very grateful if you could write a letter of recommendation on my behalf as I am now applying for [specific programme/position]. Although my application deadline is [date], I think your opinion on my [particular skills] would really give me a chance on my application.
If you can help me, I would be happy to send you my resume, personal statement, and any other required information. I understand how busy you must be, so please let me know if you need any additional resources to facilitate this process.
I would be very grateful if you would consider my request.
Best wishes,
[Your Name]
Conclusion
Asking for letters of recommendation never gets completely comfortable, but it does get easier with practice.
Remember, most people genuinely want to help others succeed - you just need to ask properly! Give them plenty of time, provide all the information they need, and always follow up with a proper thank-you.
When asking someone to write your recommendation, remember they're putting their reputation on the line for you. Respect that investment and make the process as smooth as possible. And someday, when the tables turn, and someone asks you for a letter, pay it forward!
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